I had a lot of fun with Leyton today. Lots more time than I'd thought, tho. when jen asked me if he could come over today, she said so she could watch the game at 2. i anticipated whatever game that was being over no later than 5. apparently, she meant gameS, and wasn't planning to be home until 10. i had to take leyton to her house to put him to bed & also so anthony wouldn't be home alone, as apparently his phone was out of juice & his charger had been left at his grandma's. then, around 10:40 when she still wasn't home & i texted to see if she had an ETA, she said there was some issue w/ the cops & she didn't know when she'd be home. phil had to leave work at 11:30 to go to the bar to take care of whatever it was. they got home about 12:30.
i am so exhausted, and so irritated, i can't even explain. aside from the situation (which apparently involved the tab of the person she was hanging out w/, who'd been tossed out of the bar & their wife had reported the card used for the tab as stolen, leaving jen to somehow pay this tab??) the fact of the matter is that i shouldn't have had to be out so late. or out at all, really.
anyway. i'll write about the fun leyton & i had later. i just had to get this off my chest before going to sleep or i wouldn't be able to. as it is, i had to send a note to reschedule my dr appt and to tell the boss i'm not sure when i'll be in, because i really don't think i'm going to make it getting up in 5 hours. idk if bret is scheduled to work or not, so i guess i might not have a choice about getting up, but if that's the case, i'm coming home and going back to bed. or not, i'll see how i feel in the morning, but right now, the way i feel (which is on the verge of screaming or tears or both, i think)... that's the sitch.
*sigh* goodnight & i hope monday will be extra happy for all of us!
ttfn.
carrie
Sunday, 23 January 2011
Saturday, 22 January 2011
movies!
helloooo again! : )
i got a late start out, so i only got to stop in to misha's surprise party for a minute. long enough to get hugs, a couple pictures, and give her a valentine blanket. : )
then i met jan at her house & we went to BWW for lunch. you can read all about it by clicking that link. heh. it was yummy! after eats, we went to the theatre. even after i told her what mom said, jan still seemed to want to see the green hornet. but i was over it, and over country strong, and over the king's speech. i think i'll rent that last one, tho, because over-use of the F word or not, i think it's a good story & love colin firth! : )
so, we ended up at the dilemma, and it was totally NOT what i was expecting, but we both really enjoyed it! (even tho i was sitting right next to a couple who seemed to think it was a make-out movie. i'm sorry, i'm really happy you're in love & all, but i didn't pay $7 to listen to you suck face. i'm actually kinda jealous that you're so wealthy you can afford to pay $14 to sit in the back of a room & make out. i mean, you could do that AT HOME FOR FREE! *growly face*)
so, about the movie - it's being advertised as a buddy comedy. it's really not. it has comedic moments, for sure. and it's not quite a drama. but it's more serious than the previews lead one to believe. it's about a friendship, a real friendship, and about love. (also, a note about the green hornet - beck saw it tonight & said she really liked it, so there you go. *laugh* i still don't really want to see it anymore, at least not in the theatre, but will likely rent it at some point.
after the movie, when i got home, bret's friends angela & tori were here hanging out. they'd watched The Bourne Identity. we chatted for awhile - they are both neat young ladies! - and then they had to get home, and bret & i went to WM for groceries.
i *heart* grocery shopping (especially when i don't have to pay for the groceries!)!! : ) we did a pretty good job of sticking to our list, except i did find cubed butternut squash that i picked up to try. i think i'll saute it up for dinner tomorrow w/ a little butter & cinnamon! or possibly make my own version of pumpkin curry...oh! heh.
when we got home, we put in The Bourne Supremacy & golly matt damon is a cutie! he has such an innocent face, it's awesome to watch him in such an actiony flick! : ) the bourne movies are all awesome & GREAT big-screen movies. watching makes me wish i had a big-screen! lol
after the movie - or maybe before it's over, i'm super sleepy! - it shall be time for bed. leyton's coming over tomorrow to hang out while jen watches the bears game. we'll probably watch some thomas, take pictures, and play cars & castles, and maybe grocery store. : )
what've you been up to today? do share! God is sooooo good! : ) ttfn!
i got a late start out, so i only got to stop in to misha's surprise party for a minute. long enough to get hugs, a couple pictures, and give her a valentine blanket. : )
then i met jan at her house & we went to BWW for lunch. you can read all about it by clicking that link. heh. it was yummy! after eats, we went to the theatre. even after i told her what mom said, jan still seemed to want to see the green hornet. but i was over it, and over country strong, and over the king's speech. i think i'll rent that last one, tho, because over-use of the F word or not, i think it's a good story & love colin firth! : )
so, we ended up at the dilemma, and it was totally NOT what i was expecting, but we both really enjoyed it! (even tho i was sitting right next to a couple who seemed to think it was a make-out movie. i'm sorry, i'm really happy you're in love & all, but i didn't pay $7 to listen to you suck face. i'm actually kinda jealous that you're so wealthy you can afford to pay $14 to sit in the back of a room & make out. i mean, you could do that AT HOME FOR FREE! *growly face*)
so, about the movie - it's being advertised as a buddy comedy. it's really not. it has comedic moments, for sure. and it's not quite a drama. but it's more serious than the previews lead one to believe. it's about a friendship, a real friendship, and about love. (also, a note about the green hornet - beck saw it tonight & said she really liked it, so there you go. *laugh* i still don't really want to see it anymore, at least not in the theatre, but will likely rent it at some point.
after the movie, when i got home, bret's friends angela & tori were here hanging out. they'd watched The Bourne Identity. we chatted for awhile - they are both neat young ladies! - and then they had to get home, and bret & i went to WM for groceries.
i *heart* grocery shopping (especially when i don't have to pay for the groceries!)!! : ) we did a pretty good job of sticking to our list, except i did find cubed butternut squash that i picked up to try. i think i'll saute it up for dinner tomorrow w/ a little butter & cinnamon! or possibly make my own version of pumpkin curry...oh! heh.
when we got home, we put in The Bourne Supremacy & golly matt damon is a cutie! he has such an innocent face, it's awesome to watch him in such an actiony flick! : ) the bourne movies are all awesome & GREAT big-screen movies. watching makes me wish i had a big-screen! lol
after the movie - or maybe before it's over, i'm super sleepy! - it shall be time for bed. leyton's coming over tomorrow to hang out while jen watches the bears game. we'll probably watch some thomas, take pictures, and play cars & castles, and maybe grocery store. : )
what've you been up to today? do share! God is sooooo good! : ) ttfn!
what the bleep?
so, jen just called to see if i was going somewhere, and mom was there, also. found out she & jen went to sam's. made me a little jealous, because mom & i have been talking about going, and she knows how much i want to go but was waiting to go together... and then they go & don't even call me? so yeah. anyway, then i told her i was going to see The Green Hornet w/ aunt jan, and mom was welcome to join us - to which mom replied, loudly & w/ venom - "Don't waste your money! The boys (that she nannies) & I walked out of that one, it was so awful!"
dang!
so then i looked up the other movies offered right now at our theatre, for the time we want to go - black swan (sorry, no desire to see it, even if it is good and about ballet); no strings attached (ummm... i'm sure it's cute & funny w/ ashton & natalie, but the production title was "F*** Buddies." no thank you.); country strong (this was a possibility); the dilemma (another possibility); and the king's speech (another possibility).
then i went to plugged in, to get a look into these movies. now, some of the things they think are "negatives" i really don't have a problem with. normally i don't care so much about language in movies, other than taking Christ's name as a swear. so, i'm reading about the 3 movies mentioned as possibilities above, and accidentally found out the end of country strong, which then made me not want to see it. so, it's between the dilemma & the king's speech. i'm going to bring those both up to jan & see which one she'd rather. other than some crude humor, the dilemma looks alright. and even tho i love colin & i know it's a brilliant movie... 20 f words is kinda making me rethink the king's speech. again, tho, depending on how/when they're used, that might not bother me...
i'll keep ya posted. i would like to know - if you feel like commenting - what, if anything bothers you about movies? is there anything that would make you not go to a movie that you'd wanted to see? is there anything that would make you walk out of a movie once there? demand your money back? inquiring mind, ppl! : )
ttfn
dang!
so then i looked up the other movies offered right now at our theatre, for the time we want to go - black swan (sorry, no desire to see it, even if it is good and about ballet); no strings attached (ummm... i'm sure it's cute & funny w/ ashton & natalie, but the production title was "F*** Buddies." no thank you.); country strong (this was a possibility); the dilemma (another possibility); and the king's speech (another possibility).
then i went to plugged in, to get a look into these movies. now, some of the things they think are "negatives" i really don't have a problem with. normally i don't care so much about language in movies, other than taking Christ's name as a swear. so, i'm reading about the 3 movies mentioned as possibilities above, and accidentally found out the end of country strong, which then made me not want to see it. so, it's between the dilemma & the king's speech. i'm going to bring those both up to jan & see which one she'd rather. other than some crude humor, the dilemma looks alright. and even tho i love colin & i know it's a brilliant movie... 20 f words is kinda making me rethink the king's speech. again, tho, depending on how/when they're used, that might not bother me...
i'll keep ya posted. i would like to know - if you feel like commenting - what, if anything bothers you about movies? is there anything that would make you not go to a movie that you'd wanted to see? is there anything that would make you walk out of a movie once there? demand your money back? inquiring mind, ppl! : )
ttfn
Friday, 21 January 2011
blessings
thank you for your prayers!
i woke up this morning & said it will be a BLESSED day. the Lord granted my words into reality, and it was a very blessed day! perhaps because the parking situation is taken care of at least for a week (i thought this morning, anyway) a weight was lifted from me. the sky was beautiful with orange & pink & purple. the moon was big and round across from the sunrise.
work was rather brilliant. as a friday, a lot of ppl were gone, so my in box wasn't AS crazy as it's been all week. i worked on memorial requests almost all day, and it was nice. part of what i did today was looking up obituaries, which could be depressing, but almost all of them were for men and women in their 80's & 90's, with lists of loved ones and accomplishments. one gentleman had so many kids and grandkids - and greatgrandkids! - all named in the obit, i knew he was a very loved man and had lived a fabulous life.
for lunch, trish, marcie & i met al at el pavito. we love their food, and they are super nice! however, service tends to be kinda slow. however, today it wasn't just kinda slow. it was at a complete standstill for 20 minutes!! we ordered drinks right away - a water (me), a coke & two diet coke's. mr. pavito (not his real name, lol) goes to get our drinks. he comes back with my water 10 minutes later. 15 minutes later he comes over & says the soda machine is broken & would the other three like a bottle of mexican soda? so they order that. the cooler is right there, should be 30 seconds, round trip. the food comes out, and it's all correct except al's, because he ordered no tomatoes & there are diced tomatoes all up in his carnitas! d'oh! he scrapes them off, and asks for the sodas. we are 1/2 way through our food before mr. pavito comes back with the bottles, and then he can't find his bottle opener. (we were the only ones in the restaurant for most of this time, by the way, so it wasn't that he was busy!) marcie said she didn't want him to open hers, because she wouldn't have time to drink it. so al took it home w/ him. lol even tho it was long & somewhat annoying, it was still a fun lunch, and the food was still delicious! : )
even staying til after 6 was a blessing!
met becca & nate for dinner at the chick fil a. : ) nate was already playing in the play area when i arrived. heh. i used my free meal coupon & got an original chicken sammich. i hadn't had one in a long while because i've been eating their grilled chicken. it was sooooo good, tho! nom nom nom! it's funny, tho, i am apparently the poster child for the grilled wrap now. *laugh* wes (i think that's his name, the night manager) asked if i was getting the wrap, and then a couple of the waitstaff asked later. heh. i was like, "not tonight, but of course you have them tonight!" it was a lot of fun to hear about beck's recent mission trip to mexico. to hear about the work God's doing down there & what He allowed her and her group to do... AMAZING!
and i can't wait to see pictures!!! : )
aunt jan called to see if i wanted to hang out tomorrow, so we're going to buffalo wild wings (BWW to those in the know?) for a late lunch/early supper (about 2:30) and then to see The Green Hornet. it looks fun, and kato...YUM.
got to chat w/ the april, which was very nice because we hadn't chatted in awhile. it was good to hear about what's going on w/ her & to get her insights on my stressy ball of stressfulness (carrie-ism).
received a postcrossing from poland, but my scanner's not scanning for some reason, so i'll have to see about showing you later this weekend. heh. also got a $5 hallmark rewards certificate, woot! and People - who knew keith urban & nicole kidman had another baby?? via surrogate, i think they said. now they have sunday & faith, which i think are both pretty names.
aaaaaaaand now i think it's time for bed. goodnight, dear friends, sleep well & have a sweet saturday! keep praying for me, as i pray for you. got a difficult task ahead on monday (talking to a new doc i've never met in a place i've never been about my axiety. someone didn't think this thru, because i'm having more anxiety about this...)!!
tt... oh!!! one more thing....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY DARLING COUSIN SISTER, MISHA!!! I LOVE YOU LOTS!!!
she is 20 today (well, it's 12:20 on january 22nd, currently...). i can't even believe she is 20 & bret is 22 & aren't they still 10? i guess i'm glad they're older because they are both much nicer. *laugh* and love the Lord, so that's good, good!
and now... ttfn! : )
Thursday, 20 January 2011
stop making me cry!
** today's a list kinda day. not any particular kind of list, tho.
** it makes me sad when i happen across a random blog - like from BON or the Next Blog tab - and it's old. like, they haven't posted in months. i wonder what happened to them, why did they suddenly stop posting? are they okay?
** today was rough. anxiety attack from the parking nazis. i do everything i can to avoid anxiety attacks, and to have one shoved on me unexpectedly really threw my whole day out of whack. once again i spent part of the day fight back tears. and once in front of the boss! :( he had to offer me tissues! (which was nice of him to offer.) i don't even want to go in tomorrow because of all the stress of today. but i will, because even with all the things i don't like, or that cause me issues, i truly enjoy my job and the ppl i work with. trish is awesome & offered to share her parking spot with me when she gets it (she won a "special" spot thru united way). and aside from the stupidity, it was an okay day. i mean, work-wise, i got all the claims in! not before 6... lol still, i was out by 10 after 6, and i even took time to organize vacations! : )
** bret cleaned up the kitchen & living room since he was home today, which was very nice of him! he's taken on organizing my movie collection. : ) also, he said he DOES get to work tomorrow, so hooray! we watched Batman tonight. tomorrow night, Batman & Robin? cuz i don't really want to watch the 2nd one again as i just watched it recently! *laugh*
** oh, after the icky day, i was so happy to get home - but had to fight w/ the driveway first! :( somehow a new pile of snow had formed since i'd left (i don't remember it snowing today?!) and then frozen, and so chloe couldn't get up over whatever hill had been formed. so i had to get out of my nice, warm car in order to chip away at a pile of ice before i could get in the driveway! booo!
** i don't know what else.
** i'm blue. (abudeeabuda)
** anyway, maybe i should go to the doctor to see about some medication. because with the resurgence of my anxiety and the way i've been feeling lately, i'm seriously worried about depression. it's like i just can't get happy. the only thing that has sparked anything really close lately is when i was with leyton last weekend. and even that felt sort of ... muted? it's like, i WANT to be happy. i WANT to talk to my friends and enjoy their company and everything. i just... can't. i'm trying to pray through... and the Lord did give me a boost today when i needed it - a beautifully written thank you card from the family of one of the memorials i sent out.
** okay, i know i've been down, i don't want you to worry. just pray, please continue to pray for me. i pray for you every day, too. : ) i joke about medication (and i might really need it, and if i do, that's okay) but i truly believe in the power of words, and the power of prayer especially. other things have made me happy today (playing w/ my templates & changing some things up w/ the look of the blog) and i have things to look forward to - tomorrow being friday is one of those things, so i'm going to try especially hard to have a FABULOUS friday. i pray you will do the same.
love you!
ttfn. i must go to SLEEP even tho it's not even 10:30. if i get to actual BED by 11, i think i'll be a happier camper when i have to get up at 6:30. goodnight!
** it makes me sad when i happen across a random blog - like from BON or the Next Blog tab - and it's old. like, they haven't posted in months. i wonder what happened to them, why did they suddenly stop posting? are they okay?
** today was rough. anxiety attack from the parking nazis. i do everything i can to avoid anxiety attacks, and to have one shoved on me unexpectedly really threw my whole day out of whack. once again i spent part of the day fight back tears. and once in front of the boss! :( he had to offer me tissues! (which was nice of him to offer.) i don't even want to go in tomorrow because of all the stress of today. but i will, because even with all the things i don't like, or that cause me issues, i truly enjoy my job and the ppl i work with. trish is awesome & offered to share her parking spot with me when she gets it (she won a "special" spot thru united way). and aside from the stupidity, it was an okay day. i mean, work-wise, i got all the claims in! not before 6... lol still, i was out by 10 after 6, and i even took time to organize vacations! : )
** bret cleaned up the kitchen & living room since he was home today, which was very nice of him! he's taken on organizing my movie collection. : ) also, he said he DOES get to work tomorrow, so hooray! we watched Batman tonight. tomorrow night, Batman & Robin? cuz i don't really want to watch the 2nd one again as i just watched it recently! *laugh*
** oh, after the icky day, i was so happy to get home - but had to fight w/ the driveway first! :( somehow a new pile of snow had formed since i'd left (i don't remember it snowing today?!) and then frozen, and so chloe couldn't get up over whatever hill had been formed. so i had to get out of my nice, warm car in order to chip away at a pile of ice before i could get in the driveway! booo!
** i don't know what else.
** i'm blue. (abudeeabuda)
** anyway, maybe i should go to the doctor to see about some medication. because with the resurgence of my anxiety and the way i've been feeling lately, i'm seriously worried about depression. it's like i just can't get happy. the only thing that has sparked anything really close lately is when i was with leyton last weekend. and even that felt sort of ... muted? it's like, i WANT to be happy. i WANT to talk to my friends and enjoy their company and everything. i just... can't. i'm trying to pray through... and the Lord did give me a boost today when i needed it - a beautifully written thank you card from the family of one of the memorials i sent out.
** okay, i know i've been down, i don't want you to worry. just pray, please continue to pray for me. i pray for you every day, too. : ) i joke about medication (and i might really need it, and if i do, that's okay) but i truly believe in the power of words, and the power of prayer especially. other things have made me happy today (playing w/ my templates & changing some things up w/ the look of the blog) and i have things to look forward to - tomorrow being friday is one of those things, so i'm going to try especially hard to have a FABULOUS friday. i pray you will do the same.
love you!
ttfn. i must go to SLEEP even tho it's not even 10:30. if i get to actual BED by 11, i think i'll be a happier camper when i have to get up at 6:30. goodnight!
Wednesday, 19 January 2011
push
i felt pushed to the edge today. it started early... did i mention that the light above my desk was flickering & buzzing yesterday? the boss very kindly took it out, to be replaced by maintenance that night. i sent a note telling them to make sure & only replace the MIDDLE light, which is the one currently in there. i did this because there was a reason we only had one light in there, and that reason was that it's too bright otherwise. too bright for me. (too bright for my last helper bee, before she left, too. i was not alone!) anyway, i got to work this morning, and what is shining, surrounding my desk?
my boss very kindly took out two of the lights before i was pushed to that extreme. of course, he also sorta snapped at me about it first. i don't think he quite understood why it bothered me so much. and i think it's just really stressy everywhere, so after the initial "verge of tears AGAIN" moment, i understood & was okay. plus, when i got back from lunch, the lights were gone. : )
(btw, if you don't understand why the light bothered me so much, i'll just say - headaches are no fun, and i have anxiety issues.)
the day flew by, as it does when one is busy beyond belief. lol but when i left at 6, it was with the knowledge that i'm well-prepared to get ALL the claims in for tomorrow's deadline! yay! i actually have some hope that i might, might get them all in before 6 & have time to do some other work, as well. hey, it's good to have hope!
for dinner, i once again had an egg sandwich. i'm on a kick, apparently! just been craving eggs this week! anyone know what that means? i'm sure there's folklore or science behind craving eggs. tonight i fried up some SPAM to go on my sammich, tho. : ) it was yummmmy!
i watched the new White Collar and then Push. since it was that kinda day. so happy to have my neal and peter back! : )
i mean, really! (i know, i have lots of crushes. *laugh*)
anywhoo, that concludes your peek into my day. i must get to bed, on the chance that bret will be working tomorrow & all. i hope he does, and yet... it is kinda nice getting to work at 7:30 & having that "extra" 1/2 an hour before anyone starts to bother me. but really i think he needs to work more, so i am praying that he gets to work tomorrow.
ALL THREE FRAKKIN BULBS.
felt like a spotlight. ugh. i very nearly cried. at 7:30 in the morning, right there in front of everyone. well, the 4 co-workers who were there that early!
my boss very kindly took out two of the lights before i was pushed to that extreme. of course, he also sorta snapped at me about it first. i don't think he quite understood why it bothered me so much. and i think it's just really stressy everywhere, so after the initial "verge of tears AGAIN" moment, i understood & was okay. plus, when i got back from lunch, the lights were gone. : )
(btw, if you don't understand why the light bothered me so much, i'll just say - headaches are no fun, and i have anxiety issues.)
the day flew by, as it does when one is busy beyond belief. lol but when i left at 6, it was with the knowledge that i'm well-prepared to get ALL the claims in for tomorrow's deadline! yay! i actually have some hope that i might, might get them all in before 6 & have time to do some other work, as well. hey, it's good to have hope!
for dinner, i once again had an egg sandwich. i'm on a kick, apparently! just been craving eggs this week! anyone know what that means? i'm sure there's folklore or science behind craving eggs. tonight i fried up some SPAM to go on my sammich, tho. : ) it was yummmmy!
i watched the new White Collar and then Push. since it was that kinda day. so happy to have my neal and peter back! : )
anywhoo, that concludes your peek into my day. i must get to bed, on the chance that bret will be working tomorrow & all. i hope he does, and yet... it is kinda nice getting to work at 7:30 & having that "extra" 1/2 an hour before anyone starts to bother me. but really i think he needs to work more, so i am praying that he gets to work tomorrow.
take care, stay warm, and happy almost friday! ttfn!
Tuesday, 18 January 2011
not what i wanted to share, but it'll do
sooo... i spent an hour while watching Dark Knight w/ bret typing up a whole bloggity blog post. it's heartfelt and all about where i am emotionally right now. but then i decided not to post it, because it's a little too much of myself.
here's the gist - EXHAUSTED. mentally, physically, emotionally exhausted. i don't have anything to give anyone right now, and it's really irritating me. there are some ppl i've been wanting to talk to for a month, and i just can't. and it's driving me crazy.
and so, all i'll say to anyone reading this who i've been neglecting lately - i'm sorry. i love you, and i'm praying for you every day, and i hope you know that!
today came very close to breaking me again, and i'm seriously ready for a vacation - except that there'd just be 100x more to do when i got back, so i can't even dream of that! instead, i am just kinda turning off my brain when i get home, watching The Dark Knight with bret, then chuck & the cape. i hope to be able to get back to myself soon.
meanwhile, here are three postcrossings i received today, which made me smile.
they are from slovenia, australia, and oregon.
i hope your tuesday was terrific, and that the Lord shines His face upon you!!
ttfn!
here's the gist - EXHAUSTED. mentally, physically, emotionally exhausted. i don't have anything to give anyone right now, and it's really irritating me. there are some ppl i've been wanting to talk to for a month, and i just can't. and it's driving me crazy.
and so, all i'll say to anyone reading this who i've been neglecting lately - i'm sorry. i love you, and i'm praying for you every day, and i hope you know that!
today came very close to breaking me again, and i'm seriously ready for a vacation - except that there'd just be 100x more to do when i got back, so i can't even dream of that! instead, i am just kinda turning off my brain when i get home, watching The Dark Knight with bret, then chuck & the cape. i hope to be able to get back to myself soon.
meanwhile, here are three postcrossings i received today, which made me smile.
they are from slovenia, australia, and oregon.
i hope your tuesday was terrific, and that the Lord shines His face upon you!!
ttfn!
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