day 2 of the headache... i am going to the dentist tomorrow because i am suspecting it could be tooth related.  altho now my mouth feels fine, and the headache isn't really there anymore.  but my shoulders are still achey.  am i coming down w/ a flu?  what the heck??  


anywhoo.  headache was not as bad as yesterday, except when some awful screechy printer made noise.  idk where it was coming from, but every once in awhile AAACCKKKK!!!  and someone brought in scotcheroo's, which i LOVE, but i only cut off a sliver.  *sigh*  someone else brough in corn dip.  i had some of that w/ some chips.  but like, five chips.  which is better than my "used to" but my nutritionist is under the impression i shouldn't be snacking at all.  well, not having carbs btwn meals, except for my evening snack.  ummm... i am trying!  mostly.  i have cheese & SF jello that i bring every day to keep me going btwn lunch & dinner.  so, it's snacking, but not carb snacking, if you know what i mean?  (i hate having to even think about this stuff, you don't even know how much!  i also hate that i am surrounded by a foodie who does nothing but talk about how much they love food & all the things they are eating/can't eat/want to eat and a closet foodie who eats all kinds of things that are bad for them & then talks about how they DON'T eat all that stuff... it just makes it hard for me to quietly sit by and eat my jello...even tho i truly love jello!  thank God!)


anywhoo again.  : ) 


tonight i met mom & the boys at jen's & anthony picked golden corral for dinner.  we stopped at my house to pick up my camera & some DP for mom cuz jen apparently only has beer in her fridge?  which surprises me because she drinks diet soda... so, idk!  i didn't look in the fridge, so mom could have meant she didn't like the soda in there.  idk, mom & jen have been really attitudey w/ each other recently, and it's annoying.  anthony started off the drive w/ an attitude, but we called him on it right from the get-go & he stopped.  he was very polite & sweet the rest of the evening.  : )  which is the REAL anthony.  he is a good kid.  

so, as you see we had some fun!  then we went back to jen's for bath & story time, and then bedtime & i headed home!  it was a really nice night.  

and now I must go to bed!!  : )  ttfn!   

Glee made me cry tonight.

oh my goodness did it ever!  first of all, if you watch it, and haven't seen it yet, and don't want to know what happens, skip down to after the ***'s okay?  okay, now, everyone who stayed... april warned me that it was going to be sad, and she said she didn't want me to watch it, but i'm glad i did.  i'm glad she warned me, too, or idk if i could have watched the whole thing tonight.  seeing kurt's dad fall, and then in the hospital bed, and watching it all play out w/ everyone not knowing if he was going to make it or not... and especially because it's october... i can still see daddy in that hospital bed.  i remember mom calling me and asking me to pick up an Rx for him on my way home.  and then calling to tell me i didn't need to because they had to take him to the hospital because he couldn't stand up by himself.  i remember not knowing what was going on & if i should go to the hospital or not, because mom had said she'd call me if he was going to have to stay there.  i remember getting a text from jen & then talking to her on the phone & her telling me i should come to the hospital.  i remember waiting in that room all by myself for 1/2 an hour, playing on my phone & wondering when they were going to bring him up to the room - they'd said only a couple minutes.  and the chair was uncomfortable, and i was wearing the same outfit i had on today.  and when they wheeled him in, there was a male nurse dressed like a pirate who wanted to weigh him and mom fought him off because he was unconscious and she i think had a 6th sense about what was going to happen and she didn't want to WASTE any time and then everyone was in the room and daddy wasn't awake and i thought, "well, he'll wake up soon."  but the doctor came in & said he wasn't going to, that he'd been down too long, and then we...


and then we were all around him, mom was praying and telling him it was okay if he had to go be w/ our Father now.  and i was thinking "no no no this isn't happening."  and i was outside of myself and couldn't CRY and coudn't ... i wish i would have held his hand one last time.  if i regret anything, that would be it.  i don't regret anything i said to him or didn't say - he knew (knows) i love him, how much so, so much.  i just want more.  


i'm doing better about october, mostly, except on days like today or things like this.  i actually smiled at halloween decorations the other day!  : ) i contemplated being at work for the halloween celebration, but have decided to take that day off as planned.  


************


okay, so heavy, right?!  i miss him a lot, and sometimes i feel like ppl push my feelings under the rug, like i should just be OVER it already, but i'm not, and idk when or if i will be, and i have no patience for those who don't see that.  (harsh, sorry.)  


*deep breath*  *smoke break to regroup*  btw, i'm trying to reduce my smoking... i'm not ready to quit, i really don't want to quit.  but i realized that i had gone from a pack a week to 2 1/2 in the past year or so, and i'd rather not push it up any farther.  further?  so, my goal is 2 packs a week, and maybe 1 1/2 a week.  


i had a monster headache all day today.  :(  well, most of the day.  it started to dissipate sometime after lunch, thank God.  i think it was about 3.  and it's still nto really completely gone.  it's just kinda ... there.  not really painful, but not gone.  ANNOYING.  oh, but we did get ice cream sundaes from our management team for customer service week today.  that was sweet.  (heehee, see what i did there?  *laugh*)  oh, and thanks to yesterday & monday's OT, i got done w/ all my deadline stuff ON TIME tonight & left a little after 5.  but i was done at 5, w/ the normal stuff.  i stayed a little later to work on stuff for Secret Santa.  : )  i really am excited about Christmas!!  


tonight's viewing aside from glee - hubby & NCIS LA, and possibly GH, but i'm kinda really tired, and i have a special issue of People to look at, so i might head off early.  lots of blogs to read, might have to wait til tomorrow.  but i do so love leaving comments... well, we'll see.  


goodnight & TTFN!  : )  

Milestone: 200th Post!

I like odd numbers, so really I should milestone at the 201st post, but I'm keeping it.  


not keeping the caps, tho.  oye!  my thing w/ that - i know i'll start forgetting to capitalize at some random point thru the post, and then it'll be all lopsided, so i choose to just not capitalize from the semi-beginning.  'k?  thanks for understanding my neuroses!  : ) 


i feel like i should share some momentous something in my 200th post, except that it's really like my 1000th post because i had a bunch on Myspace before i moved over to Blogger, and then i have a whole bunch here that are now private due to some ... well, to put it nicely, some ppl just can't mind their own damn business.  : )  


anywhooooo... today was a pretty good one!  got a free 10 minute massage as part of our customer service week.  i don't really like to be touched, other than hugs and things, you know!  but this knot in my shoulder needed some serious work, so i signed up & this gal was very good.  my shoulder & arm do feel better, but still ... i think i could use another 1/2 an hour!  (maybe there will be openings on thursday...oooh, i could get in again!)  i grabbed a spinach salad for lunch & worked thru, because i had to leave for class #2 at noon.  or so i thought... 


i got to the hospital at 20 after 12, thinking the class started at 12:30.  um.  class started at 1.  d'oh!!  so, i looked around the gift shop for a little bit, then worked out some things in my food journal for a little bit, then went into the classroom about a quarter til to get weighed & all that stuff.  good news - by cutting out regular soda & starting my diet changes, i've lost 6 lbs in 2 weeks!  *shocky face*  only 100000 lbs to go!  LOL  nah, not really.  i'm not a tanker engine.  ; )  


so, class was pretty interesting, and i continue to learn some good things, like resources for balanced meals.  then i spent the rest of the afternoon at work, stayed til 6 again.  will likely be there til 6 tomorrow.  thursday i'm leaving on time cuz it's LEYTON DAY!  and anthony, now, i think!  : )  tomorrow's payroll cutoff, tho, so i shouldn't need to stay late after that ... til next time!  *laugh*  


after work, i ran over to hy vee to get some balanced meals and kitty litter.  and a phone card.  $74 later i headed home.  *laugh*  megan was supposed to come over for cans, but she did not show up, so idk what the deal is there.  heh.  i made one of my healthy choice meals (didn't really like it, refer to link above) and watched a really awesome episode of The Event, pretty cool ep of Castle, and a really great episode of GH from today!  : )  will have to catch up w/ Chuck tomorrow.  got to chat w/ april a little more than yesterday, which was nice.  : )  


ah, the daily life.  so grateful to have it!  heh.  


i had in my head another topic to discuss, concerning the recent focus on bullying and its effect on teens...but i just don't have the energy right now to do it!  i need to zzzz.  so i'll just say goodnight and work on that for another day.  ttfn!

i can't even remember...

so, i found myself in a bit of a shopping haze today.  on etsy.  do you know about etsy?  it's this amazing online marketplace for vintage & homemade wares, and it is a.ma.zing. amazing!!  : )  i believe micaela is the one who told me about this site, but now i'm not sure.  *laugh*  i know she's responsible for my finding our city lights, which has a shop on etsy... hmm.  


anywhoo... while tooling around on etsy, i found some adorable cards for some adorable ppl, and i can't wait to get them so i can immediately mail them out!  lol  also today i forgot my lighter at home, so i had to walk over to walgreens to get a new one, and while there i got a mailer to sent natalie something as well!  now the challenge will be getting to the post office to affix proper postage to get it mailed out.  if i can remember where the PO is on the illinois side, i'll stop there after my class tomorrow.  : )  


today kicked off customer service week at work.  we had bagels & cream cheese for breakfast.  nom nom!  *laugh*  lunch was mediocre, but there was a diet dr. pepper involved!  then, had an amazing salad from subway for dinner - spinach & veggies & oil & vinegar dressing & imitation crab meat.  that's right, it was my seafood & crab w/o the bread.  and w/ wayyyy more spinach.  YUMMIE!  


was at work til 6, then came home & tried to chat w/ april, but i wasn't very chatty (sorry!) because i was trying to do too many things at once, and really today wasn't that interesting!  i watched CSI Miami (so happy happy happy to have my horatio back!) and undercover boss (awesome!  did notice that this CEO was WAY generous w/ all her ppl!  like, normally they'll give each person something that equals about $5000.  this time around she was giving 6 months off w/ pay, flight lessons, college scholarships...!  very nifty!!).  oh, and desperate housewives, which is funny & sweet & a little creepy...!  oh!  and i sorta stumbled on this asian series, A Man Called God.  the lady who played Sun on LOST is in it, and it's in korean (i think) w/ subtitles. and sometimes they speak english, still w/ subtitles.  i don't really get how korean film works, i think.  *laugh*  


aaaannnnnd.  it is so totally time for me to go to bed.  : )  have a great one!  ttfn!  <3 ya!  : )  

random zzz...

i need a good massage.  my left shoulder/back is messed up somehow.  i think it's tension, but probably i'm also sitting wrong at my desk.  bother.


dreams were interesting last night.  there's this guy who i was obsessed with all through jr high & HS.  he's now happily married & has a baby on the way (or recently born, i'm not actually sure).  i haven't crushed on him in yeeeears.  but for some reason, he was in my dream!  and we were talking about baby names & playing w/ lightsabers.  anyone wanna try to interpret THAT one?  lol  there was also a fairly normal one that had to do w/ driving in a car w/ mom & leyton & anthony, and we were going to a restaurant, but i was following someone from work into the grocery store.  in the car.  odd!  


my plan for today was to have a Batman marathon, but then aunt jan called & so i met her & we went to el rodeo for lunch.  i had two softshell tacos & way too many chips w/ bean dip, but it was very good!  then we went to grammy's for canasta, and ALMOST won!  again!  *laugh*  


i read my People, watched L&O:LA (skeet ulrich, whom i have missed since jericho got cancelled, is awesome), and Outsourced, which makes me LOL many times!  : )  got to chat w/ april, and joy for like a minute.  read some email.  good times!!  


and... that's all i got for you!  check out my review of WW bars at the menu.  : )  may your monday (and mine) be stress-free and superb!


tt
fn!

hazy lazy saturday showmance

i've had a lovely, relaxing day.  i got up around 10, wrote out some postcards, read some mail.  left at 11-ish for the post office.  stood in a line that went all the way to the doors.  bought stamps & more stamps.  and international stamps.  heh.  then i went to the mall.  the plan was to get a (late) birthday present for a friend.  except i got freaked out by the parking lot.  :(  they had a big portion blocked off for ... idk what.  i thought i had a spot, but then it turned out to be handicapped, and then there was another car backing out, but i missed that spot.  and then there were just cars everywhere and... i got panicky.  so i drove out of the lot, thinking i might go back tomorrow.


it was such a beautiful day!  i drove around for awhile, taking pictures... 

there were some crazy ppl out driving today, too!  i only take pictures when there are NO CARS around when i have my big camera, because it's not the easiest to handle w/ one hand, and i don't need to cause or be in any accidents!  i also do not turn in front of ppl when i have to turn left & there's oncoming traffic, especially if they have their signal on.  


i was happy to get some pictures of the changing leaves, and hope to take more as the leaves change more.  i don't want to miss them again like i did last year!!  


once home, i spent the afternoon watching csi: NY, blue bloods, GH...aunt carol called me for help uploading pictures to FB.  : )  today they celebrated aunts janie & jan's birthdays, with breakfast at symposium & then rousing games of hand & foot (canasta) and present opening.  don't they look happy???

now i'm going to watch some more GH & whatnot.  doesn't this sound like such an exciting day?  *laugh*  but it is just the kind of relaxing day i needed.  next week will be busy, again, still, and i'm grateful for this time that i get to just veg out & rest up.  : )  


ttfn!  

You Again?

this was the movie mom & i saw tonight, and if you like smart, funny movies with surprises, this one is for  you.  i loved it!  i especially loved when KB's character goes off on the bullying character, letting her know how miserable she made her in HS.  and that the former bully APOLOGIZES.  


if only we could get kids to understand how awful bullying is before they grow up.  if only we could get the ADULTS in their lives to pay attention and STOP THE MADNESS of bullying.  corey said it better than i can at the moment.  please go check out his entreaty to stop the bullying.  he has a couple good links, as well.  the recent suicides that have been in the news have been gay teens/young adults who were struggling w/ all that entails, but bullying is not a gay epidemic.  it doesn't matter if someone is gay, straight, black, white, young, old, male, female... we need to, as a society, put a STOP to bullying.  when we see it, squash it.  if you are involved in children's lives, TALK to them about it.  if you see/hear them doing something mean, even if it seems insignificant, tell them right then & there that's not good behavior.  show them how to be caring of others by your example. 


...


anyway, back to the movie...  


i think i shall own it.  of course, my movie buying budget is tight - i still don't have a lot of the movies i want!  *laugh*  but it's a keeper.  and, can i just say, i think kristen bell has been added to my girl-crush list.  i've enjoyed her since Veronica Mars, but didn't really think she was all that pretty.  cute, maybe.  ironically, in this movie she is decidedly UNattractive for a portion of it, and yet for the first time when she's out of her "awkward" stage in the movie, i understood her prettiness.  there was a GREAT surprise (to me) cameo by patrick duffy.  he looks GOOD!  i hadn't seen him in anything for a really long time, and it was nice.  made me want to watch Dallas.  is Dallas on DVD?  must check that out one of these days.  


the best surprise in this movie, tho - and he's not in it nearly enough to make me happy - sean wing.  

OMH - HOT!  i'm skipping the crush phase with this one & going straight on to giving mark harmon a run for his money... LOL  : )  also hot w/ colin farrell hair, as evidenced here.  mmm!  


moving on... ; )  


i didn't want to get up this morning.  i was having a very snuggly sleep!  i know i was dreaming of something, but can't remember what now.  anyway, i did get up, i went to work - EVEN remembering that there was an 8 o'clock meeting this morning, and only being a couple minutes late for it.  they hadn't even started yet.  : ) that was a little over an hour & a half, which made the day flyyyy by - as i was only there until noon.  heh.  i did manage to do my error report while there, and i think some vacations, but i can't rightly recall... 


ah well, i left at noon and came home to NAP straight away.  well, i put on some pre-jammies, and then i fell into bed for a cozy hour.  sweeeet!  when i got up, i snuggled myself on the couch and read last week's People magazine.  (apparently i don't get one this week?  maybe it's just late...)  then i figured since i had already checked out so many new shows, i shouldn't deprive myself of one more... and i watched No Ordinary Family.  and of course i liked it!  michael chiklis has been one of my darlings since his Commish days.  : )  (ooh, that would be a show i'd like on DVD, too!)  and kay panabaker!  i didn't know she was in this show!  love love love!!!  (if you didn't know that i have a love for lots of different actors, actresses, musicians, bands, authors, etc...well, nice to meet you!  love you, too!  *grin*)


i also watched the latest Apprentice, and when i got home from the movie, Survivor.  lots of drama on both these shows this season!  makes it so much fun to watch!  i don't want drama in my life, but on TV it's good.  : )  


wrote out bills.  i need to go to the PO tomorrow, which means i should get up by 11.  : )  oh!  i was so mad... so, after the movie, i went across the street to the BP, even tho i was really trying to boycott them, i like the Big 10 Mart.  i was just going to run in for a diet dr pepper & smokes, but then i was nearly on E, so decided to just get gas at this stop as well.  i put $20 at $2.69/gal.  did not fill my tank, but i wasn't expecting it to.  however, then i got down the road a bit & saw that gas at kwik shop was $2.52 and i have a Plus card for 2 cents off, which would have been $2.50/gal.  i could have saved NINETEEN CENTS a gallon!  that's just crazy to me, am i the only one?  i mean, there's usually a 30 cent difference btwn iowa & illinois, but to have nearly a 20 cent difference from stations on the same ROAD for pete's sakes??  UGH.  ridiculous, that's what i say.  (but, of course, i also want to bring back the time when gas was 89 cents, so...LOL)


whew.  so, that's my Friday!  i hope yours was FABULOUS and that you have a very great saturday!  


don't forget to stand up for kids in your life!


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